The day before Tyler starts school

I just wanted to write down how I’m feeling and all these crazy thoughts going through my head as my firstborn starts school tomorrow. I was fine the whole of summer and even this past week, keeping busy with last days of fun with Tyler and Honey Nut.

Then as we had our last outing to the miniature railway yesterday and there was nothing left to do but get ready for his first day, suddenly I had all these feelings of anxiety and nervousness and feel sick, as if I was the one starting school. You know that feeling on the night before you start a new job, or that feeling when you do start a new school year. Just bleurgh.

Day before school

I had thoughts like, what if he holds his pee in all day and doesn’t go to the loo and then wets himself?? Will he get hungry between breakfast and lunch. Will he cry? Will he cry midweek when he realises this isn’t a one-off, it’s everyday! Will he eat his lunch? What if he can’t open his crisp packet? How is he going to cope having to learn about things other than trains?! At the end of the week, will he be a different boy than the boy he is now? Will he suddenly be all grown-up and moody?

Then I had thoughts about me, will I make mum friends or will I be one of those loner mums that doesn’t talk to anyone and rushes off without making eye contact with anyone?! Gah! I hate overthinking stuff, but I couldn’t get to sleep for ages with these thoughts whirring through my head.

Now that I’ve written them down, they are rather stupid thoughts, I’m sure he will be fine. And tomorrow when we go in, I’ll show him where the loos are before I leave him there.

Randomly at 2.30am this morning, Honey Nut started stirring and making sucking noises in her cot. I turned to put her dummy in her mouth, and at that exact moment Tyler put his arm around my back saying “I want a cuddle mummy. I don’t want to ‘something something'” He sounded so upset in his sleep but I couldn’t work out what he said. Was it “I don’t want to go to big school”? Earlier this week he was saying he wanted to go to the little school (ie his preschool) and not the big school. He’s been watching the video I took of his last day at preschool the whole summer. It’s so sad!

Anyway I gave him a cuddle and he went back to sleep and I gave Honey Nut a little feed. Meanwhile Crossrail works had started outside DRILLLLL!!!!! God it was so loud so I shut all the windows and went back to sleep eventually.

This morning we made Tyler try on his full uniform. He threw the worst tantrum, “I DONT WANT TO WEAR IT WAHHH!!!!” I was like, oh my god, is it going to be like this everyday. Then my husband took him and sat him on his lap, asking him if he was scared about starting school, was he going to miss his friend R, is that why he was upset? He didn’t answer him, but he calmed down after this one-way chat and suddenly liked wearing his uniform. “I look so beautiful!” he said haha. So maybe he was scared, maybe that is why he wanted a cuddle at 2.30am. But my husband said to him that there’ll be lots of other children like him to play with, it will be fun.

We did our first ‘grown-up’ food shop with an actual shopping list! I planned our dinners for the week and what stuff to buy for Tyler’s lunch and after school snacks – bread, cheese slices, pom bear crisps, wotsits, apples, grapes, watermelon slices (Tyler’s request!), cucumbers, mini chocolate muffins, little bottles of water, chicken nuggets, mini pizzas.

And now we are home just chilling out, as we’re as prepared as can be now for tomorrow. The uniform all fits, I adjusted the elastic on the trousers, everything is labelled, the shoes fit perfectly. So yeah, I just wanted to write this down as there’ll never again be a first day at primary school, as with Honey Nut I’ll be a school mum pro by then – hopefully! My mum remembers not knowing how to do my tie up on my first day at school, and she says I cried on the third day (so I must have realised then that school wasn’t a one-off!).

Is your little one starting school this year, or if you’re a school mum pro, do you remember what you were thinking the day before the first day?

Sabrina x


20 responses to “The day before Tyler starts school

  1. I’m sure he will be fine! He will have learnt so much from Preschool. He will understand routine and what’s expected of him, as carpet time, playtime. Definitely show him where the toilet is, I’m sure staff will remind them to go! He was always well able to manage his snack and again this isn’t something completely new to him. I’m more than sure he will find another train enthusiasts!!! Good Luck Tyler! Enjoy your school journey! X


    • Aw thank you Sue 🙂 I honestly can’t believe this time has come, I remember it like yesterday when we were just visiting the preschool for the first time! I’m sure he’ll be fine too, it’s just irrational mum thoughts I’m having. And you’re right, he’s learnt so much from preschool (thank you!) and all boys love trains don’t they! X


  2. This is me too! Not silly thoughts at all. Max will be having school dinners but I’m really worried he won’t eat anything. He starts on Thursday and I have so many thoughts running through my head x


    • Aw good luck to Max. I can’t stop crying, my baby boy all grown up! Wow they seem so young to have school dinners. Hopefully seeing the other kids eat will make him want to eat too xx


  3. I hope he enjoyed his first day! My daughter starts on Wednesday and I feel so emotional about it, I’m sure she’ll be fine. At the moment she’s telling me how excited she is! Let’s hope it lasts!xx


  4. My eldest is starting school tomorrow and the littlest is starting preschool so i’m pretty much an emotional wreck right now. For the first time in 5 years i’ll have no children at home and i don’t quite know how to feel about that yet. Really hope everything went well for Tyler (& you) today! xxx


  5. I can completely relate to this. My daughter started preschool today. I was so nervous before hand about the school gates and other mums but it was fine. Good luck x


  6. What a great post to be able to look back on lovey. Its important to write down these sorts of feelings. It’s such an emotional time but you’ll all do great. I hope it’s all going well for him! 🙂 x


  7. It’s going to be so difficult when my little man starts school. They still seem so little but I’m sure once the initial apprehension is over with they’ll love it. Thanks for linking up to #MarvMondays. Kaye xo


  8. Pingback: My Boy’s First Week at Primary School | The Mummy Stylist·

  9. Pingback: To the parent whose child is starting Reception this year… | The Mummy Stylist·

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s